by
Will Durant
I find in the Universe
so many forms of order, organization, system, law and
adjustment of means to ends, that I believe in a
cosmic intelligence and I conceive God as the life,
mind, order and law of the world.
I do not understand my God, and
I find in nature and history many instances of
apparent evil, disorder, cruelty and aimlessness. But
I realize that I see these with a very limited vision
and that they might appear quite otherwise from a
cosmic point of view. How can an infinitesimal part
of the universe understand the whole? We are drops of
water trying to understand the sea.
I believe that I am
the product of a natural evolution. The logic of
evolution seems to compel determinism, but I cannot
overcome my direct consciousness of a limited freedom
of will. I believe that if I could see any form of
matter from within as I can see myself through
introspection, I should find in all forms of matter
something akin to what in ourselves is mind and
freedom. I define "virtue" as any quality
that makes for survival, but as the survival of the
group is more important than the survival of the
average individual, the highest virtues are those
that make for group survival: love, sympathy,
kindliness, cooperation. If my life lived up to my
ideals I would combine the ethics of Confucius and
Christ; the virtues of a developing individual with
those of a member of a group.
I was a Socialist in
my youth and sympathized with the Soviet regime until
I visited Russia in 1932. What I saw there led me to
deprecate the extension of that system to any other
land. Experience and history have taught me the
instinctive basis and economic necessity of
competition and private property. Im not so
fanatical a worshipper of liberty as some of my
radical or conservative friends; when liberty exceeds
intelligence it begets chaos; which begets
dictatorship. We had too much economic liberty in the
later nineteenth century due to our free land and our
relative exemption from external danger. We have too
much moral liberty today, due to increasing wealth
and diminishing religious belief. The age of liberty
is ending under the pressure of external dangers; the
freedom of the part varies with the security of the
whole.
I do not resent the
conflicts and difficulties of life. In my case, they
have been far outweighed by good fortune, reasonable
health, loyal friends and a happy family life. I have
met so many good people that I have almost lost my
faith in the wickedness of mankind.
I suspect that when I
die I shall be dead. I would look upon endless
existence as a curse as did the Flying Dutchman and
the Wandering Jew. Death is lifes greatest
invention; perpetually replacing the worn with the
new. And after twenty volumes, it will be sweet to
sleep.
(Source: From the
record, This I Believe, edited by William
Morrow)
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